How to Cope When Your Country is Invaded

 

These days not a day goes by without a war happening somewhere on this planet. Gaza is on fire, revolutions in Venezuela, Ukrainian crisis...

This year a full on war started in Ukraine, my Motherland. It's been tough to watch  Ukrainians fight with corruption and battle for freedom and democracy, defending its own borders from one of the largest and rough countries.
I'm not against all Russians, I'm against anybody who blindly follows autocrats like Putin, against imperialists and thugs.

My every single day starts with checking news, thinking about my countrymen, those who suffer the most. I sing Ukrainian songs and look for ways to stay involved and help.
So, after months of stress and tears, after trying to show support and blaming myself for not being there with the people of Ukraine I started praying for peace in my heart.

Negativity only brings more negativity. And even though times are really hard it's important to stay kind and positive.

Here is a list of actions I can take to get myself through this:

  1. First, research the facts and decide for yourself who's right and who's wrong. It won't be easy.
  I have to be honest, I'm usually on the side of those who defend their country from invaders.

  2. Keep it cool. Remember, we are only humans so when speaking with a friend/acquaintance from the "other side" let them share their opinion first. Ask them questions instead of trying to persuade them your way.
     What happened a couple of times in my case is when the opponent talks he/she repeats the propaganda they've been fed through media. Once they hear themselves they may understand how ridiculous and science-fiction it sounds. Stay calm, don't put all your heart out there debating because the opponent has the same goal, to prove you he/she is right.

3. Be a better version of yourself. It may sound odd but right now when your whole nation is on news and all over media each one of us is a representative of our country. Be polite and stay kind. I'm not saying you should be kind on a battlefield. I'm talking about people like me, who are immigrants or just peaceful citizens of Ukraine.
  I'll admit there's a lot of work for me ahead. Being a better version of myself is a task that will take me a lifetime but at least it's a goal now. 

4. Find ways to support. Rallies, demonstrations, writing letters to government - those are very important steps that should be taken. We can't do it all but we can definitely figure out how we can help. Whether we can donate to soldiers or to children of fallen heroes, or we can physically be there to help and volunteer, every little thing changes so much!

5.Write letters to soldiers. Old fashioned but everybody loves letters, Isn't it a great expression of love and care? And it's so easy.

6. Don't waste time on blame game. While analyzing history and the mistakes of predecessors  don't waste too much time blaming a previous generation. In case of Ukraine, new generation (people of my age 25-30) started EuroMaydan and fights pro-Russians today. The generation that grew up in a more free environment right after USSR collapse became the advocates for a new and better future for Ukraine. My own parents who live in Ukraine were raised by Soviets and have experienced a lot of hardship being fooled by banks in early 90s, loosing identity as a nation and having no certainty in a next day.

If we waste time blaming previous generation we won't improve this day and our kids will blame us for it. So instead, let's put our minds and forces together and create a better environment for generations to come. Let's teach our children to be brave and kind, cultivate cultural and national values and traditions. As Taras Shevchenko taught, "learn from others and don't be ashamed of yours" talking about culture and knowledge.

7. Lose yourself in service. When you feel mad or angry refocus your energy on serving others. Even if you serve a random person or a friend offer help and do something nice.

8. Pray. You can pray or meditate, whatever it is, as long as you are talking to God. Pray for peace and do your best to stay positive.

Ukrainians fighting for their rights!

Ukrainians are always the last to leave. The last to leave USSR as well. Everybody knows Ukrainians are not aggressive whatsoever and the fact that it came to this means people are fed up by the government that is so corrupted and ignores the people. Russian government is interested in Ukraine just because their factories don't produce high quality products and they need countries that will be forced buying Russian. 

EU is interested in Ukraine only because they are afraid that Ukraine will become a part of Russia again which means bigger opponent. Otherwise, EU could have done so much more to support Ukraine right now. I may be wrong though.  Now everything you see on Russian media supports Yanukovich and no wonder why. Putin controls the country. Now all I'm asking people to do is to think in terms of country development. It is better for us, Ukrainians, to be our own country who has business with countries around, not strained by Russian contracts.

Возможно мы, украинцы, не делали достаточно в прошлом чтобы защитить своб страну. Я объясню почему ЕС решил нас принять. ЕС не был привлечен идеей помогать Украине, которая страдает от коррупции и долгов. Много иностранных компаний перестали вести бизнес с нашей страной... Я могу долго объяснять как экономика и рынок работают, но суть в том, что без бизнеса и свободы рынка экономика не сможет развиваться. 

Я не против России, но у России своих проблем зватает. Если мы позволим Януковичу подписать договор с РФ, то снова потеряем экономическую независимость, т.к. контракты предложенные Путиным (его офисом) ограничивают возможности украинских компаний. 

Нужны ли мы европейцам? Нет. ЕС заинтересовано в Украине только потому что они бы боялись нового СССР. Информация, которую российские каналы получают конечно же поддерживает Партию Регионов. Украинцы заслуживают свободы слова и президента, который будет защищать права его народа. Янукович не способен это сделать. Если вы хотите убедить меня, что он хороший президент, дайте мне примеры его отличной работы. Опирайтесь на статистику и данные. С уважением, Украинка

Where to retire?

  It is well known by now that Americans who make a big buck try to escape from paying taxes and one of the strategies is giving up their American citizenship. Even though the USA does not allow dual citizenship they will not take away your passport.

So, basically if you are a citizen of Canada where dual citizenship is allowed once you want to come to Canada you just use your Canadian passport and when you want to come to the USA you just use your American (US)  passport.

  This way by juggling between two countries you may pick what country you pay your taxes to.  Since living cost is cheaper in Costa Rica many retired professionals move there. It is easy to get citizenship in Costa Rica. All you have to do is show a proof that you have $100,000 on your account that you are moving into the country. The soil is so fruitful all the groceries are dirty cheap.

  It is sad that smart people make money in the USA but then run away once it comes to paying taxes. Maybe because taxes are too high and they are spent on citizens who chose not to work and live off Big pocket. 
  I'm sure by the time I retire Costa Rica will be over populated by retired Americans, prices there will go up and the market will find some other "perfect country to retire" with a better offer.

 Where will you live when you retire?

Immigration reform suggested

 I have moved enough in my life to know that it is always good to build friendly relationships with neighbors. Sometimes bringing them an apple pie and asking how they are doing is all that is needed. But sometimes you get that poor neighbor who you do not want to tease with your new car and a huge plasma TV. That poor guy struggles to feed his family and they argue with the wife all the time. So helping out with groceries and maybe taking their kids with yours to football practice can really help you and your kids as well.

 A family is a small union that works the same way a country does. It is always good to know what is going on in a neighboring country. This way you are always prepared. I have read a few articles about immigration reforms and suggestions were offered to solve the problem. A particular article was more memorable because it mostly talked about Mexican border:http://www.nmpolitics.net/index/2010/05/ideas-for-comprehensive-immigration-reform/ It still does not look like there is a genius plan to once and for all resolve the issue. If only Mexico had gas and oil the U.S. government would definitely try to "help the neighboring country to minimize corruption ". But, unfortunately this is not the case.

 The problem with illegal immigrants in reality is mostly the problem of illegal Mexicans. Why don't we just say who the government is worried about in particular? Other nationalities are not that big of a pain in the tushy simply because they can't jump the fence, they would have to either fly or swim. Why aren't Americans occupied with their other close neighbor Canada? Well, the quality of life does not make them leave their houses and families to run to another country to be nobody there and clean restrooms.

 So why not stop wasting money on wars somewhere far away and help the neighbors? If the US government used its strength and power on Mexican education and help fight corruption in Mexico the level of life there would increase which would give more opportunities for people to build their future without breaking any laws and stay in their own country. It is obvious that Mexicans do not risk their lives getting to the USA because their lives are great and fabulous or they have other options. Most of the times they are left with no choice.

 Let's help them clean their mess on their territory. Fighting corruption is a tough task especially on a foreign land, but as one of the warriors said centuries ago "The best defense is attack" (A.V. Suvorov).

My mother's story

   If I counted all the times I hurt somebody I love it would be a long list. And I am not a cruel person, I would consider myself one of the ordinary people. Why do we hurt those who love us? Well, simply because we know they will forgive us. Love is all about forgiveness, right? Since a parent's love is most of the times the strongest and selfless we tend to hurt them most.

  During one of the conversations with my mother we touched the topic of love and forgiveness. She told me this story:
"There once lived a man who had a rebellious son. That boy would say bad things to his father and when the son grew older he would even heat his father. The father loved him and told his son:
- Do you see this table? Every time you are mean to me I will hammer a nail into this table.
 The son kept hurting his father and there were a lot of nails hammered to the table. One day there was no more place for nails on that poor table.
  By that time the son got older and did realize how cruel he was to his own father. He began appreciating his dad. The father then said:
-Each time you act nice towards me I will take out a nail.
Years past and there were no more nails in that table. Then his father said:
- Look, there are no more nails in the table... but the holes are left.

International student getting a new driver's license in a new state

  While moving can be very exciting it can also be overwhelming. After getting a new place with a new address and getting all your mail forwarded (by the way US Post office did not forward any of my mail even though I did everything right) there comes a time to change driver's license and get new license plates.

  I was not very excited about changing my driver's license not because of long lines at the DMV but because I was afraid my insurance could go up. At the same time if I get pulled over I may get a ticket. I checked the rates with my insurance company and noticed that I'd be paying the same amount. Since today it doesn't look like I'll make it to the DMV I am committed to go on Monday.

  SO here is the list of things I should have with me:
1. Old driver's license
2. Letters and any documents that prove my new residency address to be current
3. Birth certificate (for International students and aliens)
4. Passport with I-94 form
5. $25 for renewing the license
6. Documents that prove your legal stay in the US. In my case it is I-20
7. My happy face that will be pictured on the driver's license

  Getting new plates will cost some so as soon as I get them I'll let you, guys, know what the steps are.

A cat in me

Somewhere in a village that is divided by the lake Yalpug there is an old mouldering house I used to come to every year. I liked spending summers at my grandpa's home. The pale winter he died was chilly. He passed away few days after I turned twenty one.

Later that month I came to that very house I used to visit so often. My furry coat was warming my body but not my frozen mind and finger tips. The closer I was to the house the more vivid was gorgeous cat hiding behind the window frame. Looking right into me with flaming eyes defeating with her power that was ten or even hundred times bigger than mine. There was no sense in trying to compete with the face of nature. Walking down the hill to the half alive house with the cat in the window I could hear only the creak of my boots falling into the layers of snow.

When I finally came closer to my competitor I asked Her silently: " Is there destiny? Tell me. Do I get to chose?" And the ebony creature with a pair of yellow eyes sent a warm ball of flame into the air. I breathed it in and heard: "Wherever you go and whatever you do there are trials you will have to go through. You may make right decisions which won't make the path easier but will lead to a better end."

And I came closer to the window but the picture was blurry, I couldn't see my interlocutor. I swiped my tears off and could only see the projection of me in the window of an empty house. That cat still lives in me because She gives me strength when my human being gives up.

A. Georgiu